As I rested with Jude to get him down for his nap, the thought occurred to me that I had come so far in just a few years.  I was so lost after losing our first baby.  We moved to Austin shortly after, and in a lot of ways, it felt like I started my life completely over again.  Like a lot of lost people, I made a visualization board to give me some direction.  It had only three images, those goals that I found (and still find in a lot of ways) the most important: home ownership, a healthy baby, and total health for myself. Midway through 2007, I had none of them, and now I am well on my way to the third and last one.  So many people I know take most, or all of these things for granted, but not me.  Each one was/is a project in determination and will.  Jude has this same iron clad will, and that has made parenting more of a challenge at times.  Given my realization about how far this will has taken me in my own life, I feel less like trying to break his and more like fostering it.

Exercise – the last 15 minutes of Crunch: Burn and Firm Pilates DVD with 3 lb. weights, and then arm work with 3 lb. weights, floor ab. work, and push-ups

Mind/Body – Started Fast Food Nation during my bath today.  Added geranium and Clary Sage essential oils for female balancing to the hot water.  Was able to really relax and meditate to the dripping of the rain outside during acupuncture today.  It gradually lulled me to sleep.

Diet – 115 lbs.

Breakfast – black/green/spearmint tea with milk, 2 fried eggs, 2 chicken breakfast sausages, 1 scoop cottage cheese

Lunch – Huge salad with fruit, cheese, avocado, roasted chicken, and homemade apple cider vinaigrette – with whole grain crackers

Dinner – Roasted Orange Roughy fillets with garlic/lime zest/shitake mushrooms in parchment, and served with a Napa cabbage/green onion/cilantro/asian pear salad with sesame oil/lime vinaigrette and chopped cashews, and the bean medley from last night.

Snacks – Multi-grain crackers and a slice of cheese, green/spearmint tea with milk, chai tea with milk, half a Bumble Bar